Sorry I've been so long
with this new (late) pee sound file, all I can say is: I don't think it wasn't my fault!!
A while back I had a suggestion by my email (a big pissy huggy thank you to that person) to pee with my legs crossed - which I thought, although it sounded unusual, sounded fun, so I experimented and played with it a few times and it got my curiosity, because at first it seemed so weird to do, so hard to pee with your legs crossed, it wasn't normal, it was going against nature and the normal way of peeing? I mean, when I let my pee go I kinda hope it keeps flowing and *I'm* the one that's in control, it's me in charge of my bladder, not the other way round! I'm the one that does the gushing pee, the piss hissing, the stopping etc - yes? It's the way my body normally works.
Well what the email suggestion was that I pee sitting on the toilet with my legs crossed and make my bladder work hard to push my pee out while I clench my legs together! A sort of bladder battle?
I had to give it a go didn't I! But my first attempt at practicing this was pathetic, it was such a miserable effort, I couldn't do it, I was getting confused and so was my bladder, it was trying so hard to push the pee out and I was trying so hard to stop it by tightening my thighs and my poor bladder was confused and it was really hurting and my eyes were watering so much I couldn't see properly!
OK, let me run this by you, this is the plan: I fill up my bladder to the brim so I'm absolutely bursting
to pee, then I go
to the bathroom and take off my jeans and my pants, then sit on the toilet as normal BUT THEN I cross my legs like I'm
sitting in a comfy chair. It already sounds (and it does feel) weird!
Then, I put my phone on record and slide it down the gap between the toilet seat and my right thigh so the microphone will pick up the sound of my peeing.
OK so far, but now comes the difficult bit, remember I've got my legs tightly crossed and usually that means my urethra is shut off, I mean, women sit like that when they're out when they need a pee and they're trying to stop it coming out by crossing their legs. I've done it too, loads of times, but now I'm sitting there on the toilet, my bladder muscle is open, my piss is trying to get out because I can feel my urethra swelling up to the size of my finger, it's swelling up with my piss and my bladder is pushing like crazy to get the pee out, it's producing enormous pressure, it feels like it's going to explode and my eyes are watering like I'm crying. To be honest, although it felt quite painful, surprisingly, the delicious pain my bladder produced was quite enjoyable, I know it sounds crazy, but it actually made me want to do it more!
On my first few attempts I wimped out, I had to give up and unlock my legs so my pee could come out (by the way, my
attempts at this and lots of other 'failed' pee style attempts are on my NEW FREE pee rejects file, scroll down for
My first bladderful really took ages to finish, (I've asked for it to go right on the end of this recording, it's 2 minutes long) and I think my bladder was too full? Maybe? What happened?
Well, I released my muscle so my pee could come out, but of course it stopped dead at the urethral opening because my legs were crossed, so, I gave it a little push to give it a bit of a start and once the pee had found its way through, there was a good intermittent flow of my lovely piss. Ha ha, now I felt like I was in direct competition with my best friend (my bladder) and from now on, now I'd got the hang of crossed legs peeing, I was enjoying it, loving this, it's fun and I was having a self imposed pee challenge, Victoria versus Bladder! Here's a short sample, you can hear the spasms.
So there it is guys, my finished audio file with a lot of pain and lots of gain, producing lots of clear peeing with my
legs crossed. You can hear the various pee 'moods' where I manage to keep the
flow going, some where I've admitted defeat, one or two where it's 50/50 and my
bladder and I have agreed to compromise! Another factor for piss flow is what I've been drinking and (don't laugh) I find
that mugs of tea produce a lovely bladderful for during the day, I do so love a good cuppa!
By the way, there's quite a bit of strong hissing in spurts, that's where I'm trying to push my pee out, I think it's quite a horny hiss, it's a thick jet pulsing out under pressure. But it's all nice hot pee, hissing and squirting, dribbling to a stop and perking back up just when I thought it had finished! Yes, an unpredictable set of erotic audio pissing files for your listening pleasure, full of lovely gushy surprises which, when I'd gotten used to it, became so enjoyable that I still do it! No need to do a crossed legs pee because I *have* to, I now do it because I want to, it's turned into one of my fave pissing positions now, love it when my bladder's extra full and I can sit on the loo seat and (if it's public) there's a lock on the bathroom door (essential for me and my phone recordings) then that means I can have alcohol for extra pee and now I even have a choice of an extra peeing style - my new peeing with my legs crossed style!
I love my bladder, my peeing and my fantastic life, mwahh V x
My crossed legs peeing audio file runs for 42 minutes! It's pee after pee separated by my 'Aaahhh' sighing relief. It's 3 pounds sterling, all my own work and you can download the compressed, ready to play .mp3 file when you get the download link after clearance via Cascade. PLUS you'll also get my FREE 46 minutes peeing out-takes as well! (Full details below)
Back to Victoria Home
Victoria's Love of Pissing
LOTS OF FREE PEE! (48 out-takes lasting 46 minutes)
Hi, it's me! I'm having a clear out of my failures - my inability to pee properly!!
My phone has loads of my pissing on it, peeing that for one reason or another doesn't make the grade, I'm quite hard on myself, I like quality.
There's a whole load of this 'junk' - and I don't want to thrown them all away. For example: ones that are too quiet, (Cascade will put all these in a zip file for me/us) there's my peeing that's too short where I thought that I'd got a load!
The microphone on my phone is very sensitive and it picks up my tummy gurgling (I hate that). Also, in my early days there was distortion where I held the microphone too close to my vagina. Oh yeah and when I record my pee at home, like an idiot I sometimes leave my bathroom window open, such a stupid girl I am - so there's traffic noises over a classic bit of peeing! Doh!
There's also an attack of the squits (which was totally unexpected). I get very disappointed when my bladder and I don't make the spec we're aiming for, like if I'm so looking forward to doing a power piss and I haven't been drinking the right stuff and my bladder won't cooperate, I can't power for toffee. Also when my piss won't hiss, why? and when I run out of pee just a few seconds short of my goal dammit.
Also my experiments which are too numerous to mention, but if you've read my pages and you've bought my stuff, you'll know what I mean. But my pee stream has a mind of its own, my biggest problem is when I power up for a gush and it just turns into a spray like a watering can and goes simply everywhere!
So there you are my faithful pee fans, you'll get this free pee set when you buy anything from my site, I think it's sensible to give things to those who appreciate my 'work' than throw it away and it's gone forever, don't you? If you've been one of my happy wanky customers and you want to recieve one, write to me, I will acknowledge you xx V